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Types of requests

Hey all today I got to know about the types of requests

  1. Action Request - where you ask someone to do a specific task,go to the store and buy milk or write a 10-page report. 

  2. Connection Request - where you ask someone to do something that will help you connect with them or that will help them connect to you. This usually comes up when one person wants to be heard or understood, or when someone wants to know how another person feels about what he said. 
When needs are general, requests are specific.
Tell me whether you hear a request in the following statement:

1. Wouldn't you like to go bowling tonight? 
Is a clear request made?
There is no clear request made. This statement could mean several things and the speaker has not made it clear what he wants. Such a vague question could mean that the speaker would like to go bowling or maybe he's asking his friend to go bowling with him or he simply wants to know if his friend wants to bowl tonight. Remember that requests should be specific and focused on meeting the speaker's needs. A more direct and less confusing way to ask this request is, "I'd like to go bowling tonight. Would you like to go with me?"

2. Monica, would you please restock the storeroom soon?
The request is complete as it is..
Presence..
Positive Language..
Specificity.
What do you say?
This one is a little tricky. Because the speaker is not clear when soon is, we don't know whether she is talking in the present.
Another component missing: Specificity.
This request is not specific enough. What is soon? Tonight? Tomorrow? Next week? Specificity is very important because we all have different priorities and assumptions about things. I might think that soon is next week but the speaker thinks it means right now. Don't assume everyone operates on the same time table as you do. Such assumptions cause pain and confusion in relationships.

The very famous
Do you understand what I'm saying?
Action request or connection request?
It's a connection request . The speaker wants to know if the other person understood what he is saying. This could meet his need to be heard and understood. If he were making an action request he would be asking the other person to do something specific such as complete the report, or make an appointment for him.

What kind of request could someone make to meet his need to be heard?
What comes up for you when you hear this?.
Are you okay with what I said?.
Would you please tell me what you heard me say?

Would you please tell me what you heard me say?.
Is the Correct answer.
 It is such a relief to be fully heard. I believe that few of us have ever been truly and fully heard. Indeed, we have lived so many years without being heard, we don't even know what we've missed. Try this request a few times and I predict you will feel a longing for more!

So far so much
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